


Last Chance

by sunflowersailor



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Angst, Canon Divergence, M/M, persona 5 royal spoilers, this concept has probably been done 100 times but i am still doing it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-02
Updated: 2020-08-02
Packaged: 2021-03-05 23:08:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,708
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25673326
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunflowersailor/pseuds/sunflowersailor
Summary: After all that's been said and done, Akira still isn't satisfied with the way things turned out. Dr. Maruki offers him one final chance to change his mind.
Relationships: Akechi Goro & Kurusu Akira, Akechi Goro/Kurusu Akira
Kudos: 36





	Last Chance

“Shall we, then?”

It’s difficult for Akira to believe Dr. Maruki is truly doing okay. Even with the way his eyes crinkle as he politely smiles at him, even with the way his voice remains chipper and upbeat as ever—as if mere hours ago they weren’t exchanging fists in the Metaverse—Akira can hardly fathom how the man next to him has already managed to find his resolve.

Things hadn’t ended the way he wanted. Maruki made that clear when he’d dragged Akira down from the Monacopter and delivered his final, tragic plea. The time he’d sacrificed perfecting countless months of research only to have it thrown away, the pain of losing the one person who he cherished so much, the added bitter defeat from the Phantom Thieves, all of this was the perfect concoction for any human to become cruel and jaded. Even someone as understanding and gentle as Takuto Maruki was not above using force to realize his vision. 

That’s why, when they arrive at the station and he tells Akira that the ride is free with the same kind gaze he’d always given him when soothing his worries as his counselor, something deep within raises an alarm. It tells Akira that Maruki has something more to say to him, that they aren’t finished quite yet. 

His deep brown eyes rest on Akira in the backseat, and he opens his mouth. After a second of consideration, he shuts it abruptly and shakes his head. Again, those eyes, filled with unresolved conflict, drift toward the outside of the taxi where the station and the ending to his story awaits. 

Akira knows he shouldn’t wonder about what he might be about to say. He should just leave it alone. He should just get out of the taxi, walk to the platform, and leave the man to contemplate whatever thought was about to be released in solitude. This is the ending he risked his life for. A few simple parting words should not, no,  _ will not _ stir up any more uncertainty.

But Akira has always been the type to meddle with things that shouldn’t be meddled with. It’s how he became a Phantom Thief, after all.

“You’re not angry at me?”

Keeping the trepidation out of his voice is more difficult than he anticipates. He doesn’t want the other man to pick up too much. A small part of him is afraid if Maruki takes a closer glance at him, he’ll be able to discern thoughts Akira doesn’t want to admit are actually there. He’s afraid the other might see the hesitations that linger around like an unpleasant odor, permeating every part of his mind, leaving him unable to be truly satisfied.

Of course it was better off this way. Every victory the Phantom Thieves had achieved was thanks to the hardships they previously overcame, and Akira was infinitely grateful for the experiences all of them had gone through that brought them close together. These hardships were also what made him a stronger person, more resilient to society’s attempts to stifle his meddling with the broken aspects of the world that needed to be fixed. 

And yet, Maruki’s regrets aren’t foreign to him. He too thinks about what could have been, had Maruki been allowed his way. He thinks about Ann and Shiho, giggling as they browsed the clothes and talked about Shiho’s transfer back to school. He thinks of Ryuji and the track team, of Yusuke and his success as an artist, of Morgana finally experiencing being a human. His heart aches especially deeply as he thinks of Futaba, Haru, and Makoto, and of the smiles they’d shared with their previously deceased loved ones. Everyone had been so content.

And when he’d found out Akechi had actually lived after spending an agonizing amount of time thinking he’d perished, Akira had felt that same happiness, too. As much as it pains him to think about, even after the rest of the team had found the strength to go against their desires to face Maruki, Akira had hesitated for a moment, even though he now knows he shouldn’t have. For a fraction of a second, he had imagined him and Akechi, playing a round of chess, lightly poking fun at one another as they sipped coffee. He had imagined Akechi, free of the obligation to put on a mask in front of others, free of the pain of his past trapping him, free of being entwined in a ceaseless spiral of mistrust. A world where he could receive the love he’d missed throughout his entire life, a world where people cared about him without his false persona, was a world Akira wanted for him, more than anything.

“No, Kurusu-kun, I’m not angry with you. I already told you I harbor no ill-will. You helped me a lot, and I will forever be grateful for that.”

He turns to look at Maruki, and fully meets his gaze. He tries to keep his voice as steady as he can.

“But you’re not satisfied with how things turned out, right?”

Maruki’s glasses reflect his own face back at him. His traitorous expression shows his own uncertainty at the question. He should not be having second thoughts. He should not be imagining a world where he and Akechi exist in the same space, where he can reach out to him at any time. He should not be imagining a world where he can take him to Leblanc and roast him a cup of coffee filled with all of the lingering, warm feelings he feels for the other. He should not be indulging in a fantasy where he can soothe his aching heart with the touch of Akechi’s hand.

“Are you satisfied with how they turned out?”

Akechi will never come back. Akira will never get to help him, never get to make him understand that he can be valued, even if it seems impossible after all that’s happened. The trials they’ve gone through will be nothing more than just memories, and he’ll be unable to provide Akechi with the comfort he needs. He wanted to see Akechi grow and flourish in a world where there was nothing to hold him back. He still wants to.

“You know, Kurusu-kun, if you’re still having doubts, I can still change this reality. I’m willing to give you one final chance.”

“That’s impossible,” Akira says as Morgana peeks his head out to listen, ears pointed straight up in interest. “Your Persona is gone and so is the Metaverse.”

Maruki only hums. “I thought that as well. But recently, I’ve been hearing the same whispers I heard before I fully awakened to my powers. I know it’s still in my mind, somewhere. I can feel it.”

Akira feels a small sense of shame when his heart skips a beat upon hearing this news.

“I know you and Akechi-kun shared a special relationship that you never got to see come to fruition. I can still make that happen, you know. That’s what you’re thinking, is it not?”

Perhaps he’s a fool for wanting to forgo every minute the group has spent fighting for the justice of others in order to take the happiness being dangled in front of his face, just out of his reach. Perhaps he’s being ridiculous for finding the thought of being able to rescue Akechi from his untimely demise and give him a second chance to be appealing. Akira could show him what it was like to love and be loved, what it was like to fully trust another human with your heart without it getting ripped to shreds. He wants to give Akechi that, and more. 

He could take Maruki’s offer right now. He could take it, and give everyone the happiness they had before it was forcibly removed from them. No one would have to know, and they could live in peace for the rest of their days, as they were before.

“I’m sorry, Dr. Maruki. I just can’t accept your offer.”

And it hurts so bad that he can’t do any of that. It hurts so  _ fucking  _ bad that he has to step out of the taxi, and thank Maruki for trying to help him to have his ideal life. It eats at him, knowing he’ll never see Akechi again, knowing that he can never hold him in the way he deserves to be held, knowing he’ll never be able to show the other just how much he means to him.

Because Akechi doesn’t want any of that. He’s already told him that himself. Akechi doesn’t want to be anyone’s puppet and he doesn’t want to be manipulated by another person ever again. Taking that choice away from him would be a great disservice to his life. Whether or not he’s aware his life was being controlled doesn’t matter, because the real issue is Akira putting his own happiness in front of Akechi’s. He could never forgive himself for potentially making the other suffer more than he already has.

And that’s why, when he turns around and heads into the station, he doesn’t have a single regret about his decision. Even though it causes him a great deal of pain, even though there’s nothing he can do to stop it, it’s better this way if it means Akechi is satisfied. It’s better this way if everyone can feel good about the life they worked tirelessly to get. All of this was the culmination of the Thieve’s efforts, and Akira will not let his selfishness trample all over it.

“Did he really expect you to take his offer?” Morgana pipes up, making Akira snap out of his thoughtful stupor.

He readjusts his bag so Morgana isn’t being squished against his shoulder and looks down at him. Bustling crowds hurry past him to make it to their trains as announcements play over the loudspeakers. Watching the sea of people make their way to and from their destinations, forever being pulled in a variety of different directions, reminds Akira that every person on this planet has their own path to follow, filled with their own individual victories and defeats. Akechi said he’d carve his own path.

Akira decides he will too. Even without Akechi there.

**Author's Note:**

> Atlus make akeshu kiss challenge 
> 
> Twitter: peachh_boy  
> Tumblr: peachh-boy


End file.
